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100 very brilliant funny quotes

Time: 2018-02-25 23 : 48Source : Quotations Daquan Click: Times
1. First love is infinitely good, just hanging early.
2. When you grow up, you should marry a Tang Monk as a husband. If you want to be spoiled, spoil yourself. If you don't want to play, eat him.
3. My heart is full of love. Seeing the beauty in the world is a lover.
4. Crowding in Beijing has troubled the capital ...
5. I'm like a fly lying on a glass with a bright future, but I can't find a way out.
6. Everyone says that I am an actor, because I see my beautiful MM eyes round ...
7. I don't know who my wife is on my bed, my wife doesn't know whose bed!
8. If you have a problem, look for the cause first, and don't blame the earth for not having constipation.
9. I also fell in love several times because of loneliness. Who knows many battles, many defeats, and is easily captured!
10. I am too pure, and my pure ones are a little shameless!
11. Be a person hovering between Bull A and Bull C.
12. Q: "Is my head cow B?" Answer: "Like!
13. Boss, help me manage a sad hairstyle! Thank you!
14. How the skin is so thick, so why pigskin love.
15. Beauty is in front of her eyes.
16. Looking back, you haven't left yet.
17. The wicked are never funny, the wicked must hurry up and do evil.
18. The wicked said: Besides saying that He is a wicked, He will kill you!
19. Human members, no matter how old they are, are always young in the face of money.
20. Ducks are too arrogant, rabbits have too many mouths, I am a pig, and I am very good.
21. Beasts still have a bit of compassion, but I have no, so I am not a beast.
22. My family's goldfish drowned this morning.
23. The so-called net worm, even if you see an underline in a magazine, you want to use your mouse to point it.
24. Marrying a wife should be marrying Xiao Shao, making friends should be Linghu Chong, it's better to be a boy as Qiao Feng, and Wei Xiaobao to return.
25. If it is a mistake to have money, then I would like to make mistakes again and again.
26. The strength of a man is the RMB in your pocket.
27. In your words, I don't even believe in punctuation.
28. Life is like calling, either you hang up first or I hang up first.
29. The distance is not beautiful, it is primary three.
30. The world is so chaotic.
31. Do n’t disturb the female guests if you do n’t disturb a man ’s lamp, the aunt downstairs can turn off a whole building!
32. People who have always been dissatisfied with hairstyles have one thing in common: they refuse to admit that this is a face problem.
33. I linked all my memories into a movie, and a tragedy was produced.
34. It is said that the sister is beautiful, in fact, it is all made up.
35. Starving, doing a good job is called losing weight; stabbing people, doing a good job is called massaging; dazing, doing a good job is called deep; doing laziness, doing a good job is called enjoyment; If you do a good job, you are called attachment; if you do a good job, you are called Dazhi Ruoyu.
36. Friendship is like a vase.
37. Practice a breath inside and a fart outside.
38. If you can do it, try not to make a noise.
39. Wet diapers that can resist flooding are the real ones!
40. You are dangerous to wear, but look safe.
41. Do you believe in Christianity?
42. You go down your sunny road, I go down my underpass.
43. Wake up earlier than chickens, sleep later than cats, and earn less than bald hair.
44. Pretend to be mature and dress up in the old age.
45. Suddenly I found that I was afraid to go out since I had my glasses on.
46. I'm so lonely, I even get rid of my desire.
47. Give me a pair of chopsticks. I can eat the entire planet.
48. Don't bother me, and then bother me again, you will fall into that pit soon.
49. Don't look back, brother is just your back.
50. Brother smokes because it hurts the lungs and does not hurt.
51. Everything has a price, and the price of happiness is pain.
52. When the rivers and lakes have legends, they are dissatisfied with the city, and they are sorry for the audience.
53. I don't even say that you are killed, you haven't made beautiful people plan!
54. Marble brand insoles, shameless feet.
55. Come out and get mixed up sooner or later.
56. Hit you, hit you, do you have to pick a day?
57. Play a little mahjong and eat a spicy hot. Find a small object and live like that.
58. In this era of rising prices, I suddenly rejoiced to find that the price of air has not increased, but it is expected to increase.
59. So far, three apples have changed the world: one seduces Eve, one awakens Newton, and one holds Jobs.
60. Now Beijing only has to breathe and fart without having to wait in line.
61. Even if you already have a flower owner, I will still move the flowers.
62. Goose goose goose, cut the song with a knife, pluck hair and add a scoop of water, cover the pot with ignition!
63. Why hasn't the country used your skin to study body armor?
64. Your Excellency is a dung ball rolled over the layer of shit shell bugs that the little Sha Mi low-energy dog Wangcai raised by Huashan's rude master of mental retardation?
65. You are not the traffic police in my head, you have no right to interfere in my direction
66. Your smile is brighter than that shit in the sun
67. Those who always say that others pretend to be aggressive, you are not even aggressive.
68. I don't hate you because I don't want to remember you.
69. Confucius said: The Journey to the West is Sun Wukong's mantra, the Tang monk went crazy.
70. Others laugh at me too sensually, I laugh at others not open
71. Singing to the computer, after singing, it freezes.
72. I want to die, I bought a bottle of pesticide, and wrote on the lid ------ another bottle
73. The happiness of an ostrich is just a pile of sand.
74. As soon as I woke up, it was dark.
75. Why are you sleepy when you read a book? Because books are where dreams begin.
76. Good horses do n’t eat turn grass, so I have n’t turned around and walked around, but I came across that grass again.
77. Actually, I look handsome at one angle, but you didn't find it.
78. Friendship does not depend on wine, but you can use wine to taste it! If you don't install B, we can still be friends.
79. Sanlu and Mengniu tell us a truth: beasts are unreliable.
80. My hobbies can be divided into static and dynamic, static is sleeping, dynamic is turning over ...
81. After a long stay in the nervous crowd, I found that I was normal.
82. Our boss is a little monster and we are Ultraman. But we met the boss and ran because we didn't bring a summoner.
83. There are scares everywhere in life, and you are one of them.
84. Grandpa is not your little raccoon.
85. I want to say that I will be forced hard, the end of the world will be my birthday.
86. Why is a person alive? Just for the great grandpa Mao.
87. It's not your fault to look ugly, can't you be honest, do you have to wonder, let us know that you are the elder brother.
88. The life of eating is like a train. To sum it up, shopping, eating, shopping.
89. Zhuge Liang did not bring soldiers before he came out of the mountain. Why do you want me to have work experience!
90. Don't argue with people without quality, because it's like wrestling with a pig.
91. Book me two air tickets to heaven. I want to find Yue Lao personally and force him to hold me a red line.
92. When I get tanned every summer, I always think "It's okay, I will fix it in winter"
93. Genetics tells us calmly: Cross-species love is doomed to no good results.
94. Smokey clothing is beautiful, which makes me a panda for everyone.
95. You are short for life, but I am fat for a while.
96. You said, someday I don't want you anymore, you will never marry for life and make me feel guilty.
97. The shortcoming of your beauty is that there are too many shortcomings.
98. There must be a road in front of the mountain, even if the car is disassembled and sold in front of the mountain.
99. In this low-key world, I have to cover myself with a high-key.
100. The actors who perform will not necessarily be actors, but the grandfather will be pretending.

Article title: 100 very brilliant funny quotes

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