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100 hilarious funny quotes

Time: 2018-04-25 19 : 35Source : Quotations Daquan Click: Times
1. Pigs have a pig's mind, and everyone has a mind. If a pig has a human mind, it is not a pig, and it is the Eight Commandments.
2. Turned gorgeously, unexpectedly hit the wall with a low profile.
3. Don't use me as a male meter in the future, otherwise I will count it.
4. There is no rehearsal in life, and every day is live, not only the ratings are low, but the salary is not high.
5. Even if men conquered the world, they would one day be conquered by women.
6. It is best not to use your own photo for your avatar, otherwise it will be unlucky to go offline.
7. People who care too much about me generally have only two kinds of people, one is secretly in love with me, and the other is secretly calculating me.
8. The head on the left is flour, and the head on the right is water. When you think about a problem, you fill your head with mud.
9, handsome and car, that is chess, rich and have a house, that is the bank
10, throwing you a tiger cage, tigers dare not eat you even think you have tooth decay.
11. If there is an earthquake, I will die with you. You were smashed to death. I saw you dead and laughed to death.
12. Silence is gold. I have been silent for so long. Why can't I see gold?
13. You are my Youlemei. May I throw you away after drinking?
14, yo yo cheek trouble, Shenzhouxing, I think it will not charge the phone fee.
15. If you don't fall in love for the purpose of marriage, you are helping the elderly.
16. I love going to school, but I don't like to go to class, let alone do homework.
17, some girls do not bubble, upset. See the girl and soak up the sky.
18, you are the wind, I am the sand, you are the toothpaste, I am the brush, you are Hami, I am the melon, you do not love me, I commit suicide.
19. It's not terrible to turn her face faster than the book, the terrible thing is that she also turned it over.
20. I would rather give up the whole forest than hang myself on this dead tree.
21. I have always been in rivers and lakes, but there is no legend of brothers in rivers and lakes.
22, you and I can not eat, then you can not drink water for me.
23. A woman of all kinds is a lighter, and a woman of incomprehension is a fire extinguisher.
24. The winner is king, and the loser warms up.
25. Don't think it's golden mouth and jade, so don't talk easily.
26. The highest state of fat people is to wear school pants into jeans.
27. The best way to destroy a good song is to set it as an alarm clock.
28. If it weren't for you, I would have turned my face.
29. I heard that you are having a bad time. I sat at the door and played all day.
30. Wear your own shoes and let others find them.
31. Don't be lazy with me, I'm too lazy to compare with you.
32. It turns out that you haven't lived well in these years without me, so I'm relieved.
33. Why is it necessary for girls to think so much, anyway, they have to go square dance together for decades.
34, life is really fucking fun, because life always fucks me.
35. Why do you still fall in love knowing you will break up? So why do you know you know you're going to die?
36, people are iron, Fan Er is steel, one day without pretending to panic!
37. Every time I wake up in the morning, I know that I have to go to bed early at night.
38. Talent and genius are only one "two" behind. Therefore, talent is very good, and genius is always a little bit second.
39. Last night I took your promise to feed the dog and found that the dog died the next morning.
40. Don't wait for all the scaly wounds to turn around, because you regret that the medicine hasn't hit the market yet.
41. No horror movie can meet the class teacher who suddenly emerges from the window.
42. There is no wine in your dimple, but I am drunk like a dog.
43. What is a friend? Just put 500 yuan on the table and don't lose it. Put a pack of seeds back and you will have a pile of skin left.
44. I speak a little thunder and play a little crazy, so you call me "Lei Feng".
45. You said that you are willing to grow old with me, no, I think black hair flutters.
46. A: I want to give a bad review to the mother-in-law. B. why? A: Delivery is too slow.
47. Korea's cosmetic technology is not as good as China's Meitu Xiuxiu.
48. Never discriminate against a lunatic, he is just different from your worldview.
49. Donor, Little Nixie's finger counts, you are missing me!
50. My dream is to eat all over the world. Is anyone like me?
51. You are advised not to undergo cosmetic surgery.
52. You are a third-class citizen. Have you heard of third-class citizens? Wait to eat, sleep, die.
53. A: This sugar is so delicious. B: Where did you buy it? A: In my dream, your deep mind!
54. The most heartbreaking novel I've ever seen is my chat history with you.
55. The world is so big, I want to see it. How small can a wallet be?
56, you treat me as your TV! Get out of one click!
57 、 Women don't spend, why is it so beautiful? Men are not bad, how come to future generations.
58. I feel like you are like two pigs, because one pig can no longer describe your stupidity.
59. I have a lot of money, but they are all hairless.
60. Sometimes I feel that I have become ugly. I took out my ID card and found that I was worried.
61. Go directly to the subject when something happens. Don't take your ignorance and challenge my blacklist.
62. Uncle Police, I lost my bag. Rest assured, wrap it around me. Then return me.
63. I said at the same table: Men are things outside of me. I threw a sentence: no life brings, no death.
64. The first half is taken from the metamorphosis, and the second half is taken from the metamorphosis.
65. What is money? It's something I don't have.
66. I really appreciate the people who hit me. I learned to fight others.
67. Never charge me, there is a caller ID there.
68. Because I am not an ordinary person, I have never spoken Mandarin.
69, I will not watch you jump into the fire pit, I will close my eyes.
70. I allow you to walk into my world, but you are not allowed to walk around in my world.
71. In my next life, I must be your heart, so I will die if I don't beat.
72. As soon as others praise me, I am worried that they are not enough.
73. Every woman has one of the easiest mistakes to make, and that is capriciousness.
74. I have never told you my true identity, in fact I am Snow White.
75, long beautiful is annoying, if I had married a boy already.
76. I finally know why I need to wear a mask, not because of the germs, but because I am afraid to meet people with bad breath.
77, God! If there is no way to make me thin, just make my friends fat!
78. The night gave me a pair of black eyes, but I used it to roll my eyes.
79. If there is a future life, I will be a quilt, either in bed or in the sun!
80. Don't confuse my personality with my attitude. My personality comes from who I am, and my attitude depends on who you are.
81. Failure doesn't matter, it just paves the way for success.
82. Because it is said that the worms that get up early are eaten by birds, so I decided not to be too late in the future.
83, a woman's chest is not called a flat chest, that is called gorgeous parallel lines, do you understand.
84. Can a girl like me weigh down beauty without weight?
85. Everyone was very sexy when they were young, and they didn't want to wear pants.
86. Things used by celebrities are called cultural relics, and things used by mortals are called waste.
87. Tell my friends that I want to fart, my friends said: I go back and take a nap.
88, I want to be a female hooligan in thought, a good girl in life.
89. Don't always be cold and hot to me, then I'm afraid of catching a cold.
90. You can grow well, but I think it looks good when you make a mask.
91, the same as the underwear, how can make people easily see.
92. You are not a fool, but why do you pretend to be an idiot?
93. I think the most unbearable thing every day is the pain of breaking up with the quilt in the morning.
94. I would rather believe that there are ghosts in the world than believe your broken mouth.
95, a mountain can not accommodate two tigers, unless one male and one female.
96. On the way to becoming a talent, I live a silly life every day! Actually I'm very smart, but IQ is a little lower.
97. Oops, why my clothes have shrunk again.
98. If friends can sell, I guess I can still make a small fortune.
99. The belly is not terrible. The terrible thing is that there is no real material inside.
100. For the next generation of the motherland, no matter how ugly you have to fall in love.

Article Title: 100 Sentimental Funny Quotes

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